To-Do List

So it's Christmas break, and I'm back at my house at school for a few days and have been attempting to be somewhat productive with my spare time. Last night I took the time to write a to-do list of things I should do today. It is nearly eight now and I was just considering rewriting my list to incorporate the things I did do today. This way I could feel more accomplished. Below I have included both versions of the list.

To Do (version 1, 3AM)

• Email school office about a class
• Email a professor to ask a question
• Finish putting up clean laundry
• sweep/mop the bedroom
• clean windows
• put up that picture
• put the headboard back on the bed (pics of my artistic creation of a headboard possible later)
  
• go grocery shopping
  

To Do (version 2, 7:30 PM edited for reality)

• Stay up until 5AM watching Mystery Science Theater 3000
  
• Wake up past noon.
• Sleepily talk to the instrument repair man who woke you up at 1PM.
• play online
  
• look through pile of folded laundry for clothes
• watch UFO documentaries
• play video games
• order out for pizza
• blog

Oh well, it was a long semester. Perhaps a little laziness is in order.

Good to be Bad

If you are like me, you know there are some things that are just so awful they rock. Don't feel bad about this. Don't be ashamed. Don't try to hide it (ok maybe try to hide it). Sometimes your friends won't get it. Sometimes you just have to accept that not everyone can be enlightened. I've decided to put together a list of some of these things. Enjoy.

Next - If you flip to MTV in the middle of the night, you're likely to find Next. Scientific studies show that exposure to this show will start to kill your brain cells after about 15 minutes. The premise of the show is that a stupid teenager gets to choose from 4 or 5 other stupid teenagers on a bus to go on a date. There are small (sometimes just one dollar) amounts of money involved. The stupid teenagers are given scripted "zinger" lines to help them cope with rejection. All in all it is supremely awful... and really funny.

McNuggets - I know that McNuggets are not chicken. I understand the phrase "processed chicken product". Perhaps it is some relic of my childhood, but I can't live without McNuggets. I try to stay away from Crack Ronalds, but the menu item that keeps dragging me back in are those tempura fried nuggets (dipped in honey please). The trouble is I always miss the dark meat nuggets. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. Too bad they were taken off the menu in 2003. If you are of a similar opinion, there is an online petition to get them back.

Smiley Face - This underground stoner flick with Anna Faris stole my heart. Premise is: Jane (Anna Faris) accidentally eats too many pot cupcakes. From the scene where the entire movie stops for several seconds to allow Jane to stare at a lamp to the one where she rolls on the ground because backing her car out of the driveway was too scary, it's eerily hard not to pull for her. Be warned though. Unlike Harold and Kumar, she doesn't get a happy ending.

Laurel K. Hamilton - I'm pretty into fantasy novels and I considered putting the whole genre on this list. I decided to stay simple though, and go with Laurel K. Hamilton, author of the Anita Blake series. Ever wonder how to activate a triumvirate of power between a necromancer, master vampire and werewolf pack leader? That's right. Orgy. Despite the creepily sexual Mary Sue-ish protagonist, and the repetitive plots, the series is actually fairly compelling and not a bad rainy-day/beach read. Also, whether you're in it for a sexy vampire, a realistic and capable female protagonist or a good ol' vampires v. weres v. zombies extravaganza, these books are better than Twilight in every way.

Mystery Science Theater 3000 - What happens when you search out the worst movies ever made, use them to create a low-budget tv show featuring robot puppets, and constantly change the premise and main character of the show? Emmy-nominated, Peabody Award-winning genius. That's what happens. Possibly the root of all my crap loving, MST3K is the king of all "So-Bad-It's-Good". A basic episode is an old sci-fi movie with silhouettes of the sarcastic host and two robot puppets watching it and ripping it to shreds with short skits before commercial breaks. Lines like "I'm gonna curl up in his sock drawer and sleep for days" still remain in my vocabulary (parents, this is why you shouldn't let the tv raise your child). Some titles of the movies featured include "The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies", "Danger!! Death Ray" and (my favorite), "Squirm" which is about radioactive worms.
Hard to find now, DVDs can be special ordered and some of the episodes are available for download on itunes.

So thats it. Five awesomly bad things from me to you. Enjoy! (or at least try to)

Doubt

I just saw Doubt, and it was completely enthralling. I left the theater impressed but I realized the true genius after I scoured Google for 45 minutes trying to find answers to the unanswered questions the movie leaves behind. By the way, they aren't out there, and what a brilliant move. The murky mysteries and unresolved questions are now stuck in my mind because they are unanswerable, just as they are with the fictional characters.

The cast was phenomenal. I've been a fan of Meryl Streep, but Philip Seymour Hoffman won me over with this one (I've previously been unimpressed by most of his work and have always remembered him as the flaming reporter in Red Dragon). Amy Adams was wonderful as well. The cinematography makes use of a lot of slanted shots, providing a subtle sense of uneasiness throughout the film, and without revealing too much, the visual metaphors and symbolism added a lot to the drama. Attention was brought to some recurring details (possible spoilers: like open windows, popping light bulbs, storms and fingernails) which were obviously significant, but never explained, leaving the viewer doubtful of even the film-makers' message.

Ten Reasons I Will Not Miss 2008

10. Large Hadron Collider - The good news: It didn't suck the world into a black hole. But it did break. After only 9 days of functioning.

9. Big Name Deaths - Namely Tim Russert- journalist for MSNBC, Heath Ledger- actor, Benazir Bhutto - president of Pakistan was assassinated by al-Qaeda to be succeeded by her husband (technically 4 days before 2008), Mark Felt - aka Deepthroat and others

8. Russia v. Georgia - A small yet very real war broke out between Russian and Georgia this year in early August. The troops have been called off now, but tensions remain as the two countries squabble over oil, civilian deaths and their conflicted history.

7. Sara Palin - I never want to hear her talk again. Unfortunantly she's still one of the most popular republicans, despite arguably cementing John McCain's loss.

6. Hackers - One of the most under-reported stories of the year, foreign hackers cracked the CERN computer system, both presidential campaigns, the White House and the Defense Department this year.

5. Torture - We did it. Dick Cheney has admitted to supporting water-boarding. Investigations are currently being called for about possible/probable war crimes commited by the United States involving torture of prisoners.

4. Oh Fuck, The Economy - In case you didn't notice, the economy tanked. After a creeping recession had already taken root before summer, and the federal takeover of Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae, September brought the failure, sale or crisis of several large banks including Washington Mutual, Morgan Stanely and Wachovia. An emergency bailout was organized for the banking industry and rushed through congress. The auto industry was soon to follow.

3. Oh Fuck, The Economy Local Edition - People are getting laid off everywhere. National unemployment was 6.7% in November with rates even higher in vulnerable areas including 8.4% in California and South Carolina, 7.9% in North Carolina and a whopping 9.6 in Michigan and 9.3 in Rhode Island (thats nearly one in 10 people if you're doing the math)

2. Terrorist Attacks in Mumbai - In November terrorists attacked the Indian city, killed at least 164 people and eventually held hostages in landmark luxury hotels. The attacks not only resulted in loss of life, but have helped stir up animosity between India and Pakistan. Things are still tense, and some fear conflict. Update(12/26/08): Pakistani troops have been positioned near the border in preparation for a possible invasion.


1. Prop 8 - A proposition put on the ballot in California and largely funded by conservative religious groups like the Morman Church passed on election day, Nov. 4. The proposition took away the right for gay couples to marry in the state and struck a severe blow to the gay rights movement. Protests and the occasional riot have been springing up all over the country.

(Vice)Presidential Puppy-gate Update

PETA, in all their obnoxiously easily offended glory, has started giving Joe Biden hell about his new german shepherd puppy. If you check out their article "Joe Biden Buys One, Kills One" by Christine Dore they allege that his new pup came from a puppy mill, and that now his supporters will all march out and buy purebred german shepherds.

Uh huh.

It's starting to stir up some media noise though. Biden has respondend that he is now looking for a second puppy, possibly a golden retriever, this time from a shelter. Nice pander.

My Rocky Love Affair With the History Channel

My first post to this blog was about how excited I was about a documentary on the History channel about Dr. Bueno de Mesquita. I have to say, I was thoroughly disappointed by the show. Instead of an indepth look at the Doc and his computer program that predicts the future, they spent most of the show comparing him to Nostradamus, and then talking for a long time about Nostradamus.

Now, don't get me wrong, Nostradamus is pretty interesting but I got tired of hearing about him really quickly. First of all, he was probably not a prophet (although he tried pretty hard). He wrote a lot (at least 1000 I'm not sure the total number) of vague prophecies, with no definite linear chronology to assign them a specific date or time period. You go write 1000 four line verses about what might or might not happen at some point in the near or distant future. I bet you'll get a few things right too. Prophet or not, he's old news. Bueno de Mesquita might have a

computer

that can predict the

future

Oh and remember the "Lost Book of Nostradamus" special the History Channel featured a while back? You know, the one where someone found a manuscript that might have been from the time period, and might have been penned by Nostradamus, and was filled with illustrations from the major arcana of the tarot? The "experts" from this documentary claimed that the image of a burning tower (on the left), which is a traditional tarot image (see image to the right), featured among other traditional tarot images, was actually a prediction of September 11th.




















Dear History Channel,

I love you, but your weird inaccurate Nostradamus fetish has really been embarassing me lately. Please stop. Find help or something.

Love,
Courtney

To the well-meaning electronics salesman:

Yes. I did know that Halo is a really popular game. I even knew that I need a 360 to play it. Thanks though. Without you I might have ended up buying the Bee Movie game because the case had so many bright colors. Boy was I confused by all those titles.

Ass.

Einstein was a panthiest.

"The individual feels ... the sublimity and marvelous order which reveal themselves in nature ... and he wants to experience the universe as a single significant whole."

(Vice)Presidential Puppy Update!

The Obama family is being all boring and slow about picking a doggie but look at Joe Biden's new German Shepherd! Puppies for everybody!!

daww.

No name yet. Apparently he's waiting on his grandkids to pick a name.

25 Uses for a $5 Bottle of Witch Hazel

I picked up some witch hazel at the drug store last month after hearing that it can help get rid of the redness left behind by mostly-healed acne. It worked great but I was curious about what witch hazel was actually supposed to be used for. Turns out, EVERYTHING. It has antiseptic, anti-inflammatory and astringent qualities. Below is a list of things that you can use this stuff for.

1. skin sores
2. diaper rash
   
3. small cuts
4. swelling (soak cloths and press them to area)
5. bruises
   
6. acne
7. reduce pore size
   
8. psoriasis treatment
   
9. eczema treatment
10. aftershave
11. cracked skin (antiseptic and helps moisturize)
    
12. insect bites
13. poison ivy rash
14. varicose veins (use same as swelling treatment)
15. hemorrhoids (witch hazel is the active ingredient in many OTC treatments)
16. speed healing of cold sores
17. sunburn
18. heal body piercings (having had several I could totally get on board with this, it is thin, so it won't hold moisture the way neosporin will, and smells less than tea tree oil and bactine. Plus it stops bleeding and swelling which bactine won't)
19. athletes foot
20. swimmers ear
    
21. use as hair spray (so long as you don't have dry hair)
22. use to degrease hair roots (dab with cotton ball)
23. use to reduce under-eye circles (see swelling and bruises)
24. make-up remover
25. repair cracked varnish on old furniture (let it soak, and it will slowly melt it)

And this doesn't even cover all the applications that work internally. Those would require preparing some sort of tea with the leaves of the plant. These are just uses for that one 16oz. bottle I got from the drug store last month (which is only about an eighth used up) which brings me to a word of caution: the brand I bought, as with a lot of brands is made using a lot of ethyl alcohol, so don't drink it! I know it seems silly but there are numerous sources saying "drink it to cure _____" this doesn't apply to the drug store brand! Other than that, I highly suggest going to pick up a bottle. It runs about 5-7 bucks a bottle and is very much worth the money.